Only One, Only You

People hunt the world over for the one person who sweeps them off their feet or adds color to their life. But once they have them, they aren’t content yet. Their eyes keep roving and roaming. They say that they are still hunting for that one so truly unique and special that they would willingly forsake all others.

Marriage is a major commitment. It is a life changing decision. It is one man and one woman saying to each other that they choose to be exclusive partners for the rest of their lives, no matter what happens.

Unfortunately this is not always the case. Sometimes, a couple goes into the marriage just mouthing their vows. They act the part for everyone to see. They seem so sincere, so devoted to their spouse to be. The sad part is that given the first opportunity they will hop into bed with someone else. Thus the cycle of infidelity is begun.

Sometimes a couple agrees to have an open marriage. They agree that they are married but they are free to have flings or relationships on the side. How in the world a marriage can be open when by definition a marriage is exclusive is beyond this writer. Many have found that in the long run, it really is a recipe for divorce. Our territorial nature just can’t take the thought of sharing our spouse - with a few exceptions of course.

It seems like many people just don’t get it anymore. The very principle of marriage is committing to monogamy. This means having only this one person as one’s mate for life. Mind boggling as it is for some, it is what makes a marriage special. Marriage isn’t just built on the emotion called love; it is built on a foundation of trust. This trust is based on a base of mutual respect and understanding.

This trust is fragile. It is rather like jar. Break it and the contents spill out. Even if you could super glue it back together, the cracks would still remain. It would never be the same. The relationship, like the jar, would not be as strong, though many still give it a second chance; sometimes more.

Before you get married, it is best that you are both clear on this aspect of the relationship. There is no going back from this one for most couples. This literally breaks the relationship and the marriage. It is best to go into marriage with the ability to say, “I choose you to be my one and only partner for the rest of my life” and truly mean it. Once you say it, live up to the promise. This is a no-compromise item for most women, men, so be very sure that you really mean it when you say “you are the only one”.

Don’t hesitate to postpone the wedding if you think that your spouse to be cannot be faithful to you. You will save yourself a lot of heartache - and money - this way.
[tags] wedding,values,relationship,monogamy,open marriage,trust,respect [/tags]